3 minute Self Compassion Break

When we are struggling emotionally our natural instinct isn't to be kind to ourselves or to nurture ourselves but to become more driven and to keep pushing through our pain.

It took me years to work out that it's only by listening to ourselves and responding to our desperate need to be heard and witnessed that we can foster personal growth and go on to heal our emotional wounds.

If we want to heal we must first fall in love with your own healing journey!

Here's a 3 minute Self- Compassion exercise to help you begin your own healing work and to help you develop that much needed self compassion!

Whenever you run into a situation that is stressful or challenging try taking a few minutes to offer yourself a compassion break.

Developed by Dr. Kristin Neff, a psychologist who did extensive research on the benefits of self compassion found that the practice increased optimism, reduced procrastination and eased over thinking.

Here's my shortened version of how to give yourself a compassion break right now.

1. Bring to mind a situation in your life that is upsetting or bothering you. It might be a relationship conflict, a difficulty at work, something you regret doing, or even an issue to do with your health.

2. Think of a word or sentence that feels true to this situation. Something like "I'm feeling bad". I'm stressed out". "This is hard for me right now".

3. Acknowledge that the situation is making you suffer and say something that gives you a sense of your own humanity.

"I'm not alone".

"Everyone suffers in some way or another at times".

"My experience right now is all part of being human"

4. Put your hand on your heart or any other place on your body that feels safe and comforting. Take a deep breath and say "may I be kind to myself today."

5. Then find another sentence that speaks to your needs in this moment.

Say something like:

"I will be kind to myself because I'm worthy of kindness".

"I accept I am always learning, I'm a work in progress".

"I forgive myself"

"I accept myself as imperfect".

"I'm a good person with the best of intentions".

At first it may feel a little awkward to bring this kindness to yourself and you may only notice the tiniest bit of relief for your pain, but with continued practice, and making it familiar, this inner kindness will eventually help to ease your suffering.

Now check in with yourself.

How did it feel for you to offer yourself this self compassion break?

What small changes did you notice inside?